Monday 21 January 2008

How to be a Bottler

The Bottler has apparently 'expressed ... growing disillusionment' that PMQs 'have become so noisy and bad-tempered that the public will be increasingly repelled'.

Even by his standards, that's rich. The man is serially dishonest, entirely unable to admit to any failing or shortcoming.

Thus, regularly made to look the clunking, cretinous clod he actually is at PMQs, he resorts to allowing 'aides' to plant transparently untrue stories about how, his moral compass all aquiver, the Bottler is saddened by the Chamber's descent into heckling and abuse, a descent in which he, the high-minded paragon, has played no part.

It's a lie. The truth is much simpler. He can't bear being laughed at or mocked. He can't bear the thought he isn't being accorded the reverence he so clearly considers his by right. Above all, he can't bear the thought that Blair was so much better at it than him.

So it's not his fault – well, nothing is, of course – that he is reduced to incoherent howls and grunts, endlessly stammering, frowning, twitching and glowering impotently.

How long before, regretfully, in the interests of the nation as a whole (ie him), he scraps PMQs?

3 comments:

Barnsley Bill said...

at least he has not eaten the contents of his nose in the chamber this year... yet

Mark Wadsworth said...

For all his weaknesses, that George Osborne is world champion at baiting the Bottler. A joy to watch.

Anonymous said...

Tedious,.